End of an Era…

So, I’ve tried to start the first sentence of this blog about ten times so far and nothing is coming out right.  Tomorrow is my three year wedding anniversary, or, would be my three year wedding anniversary… however, my husband and I marched ourselves over to the Supreme Court of Hartford this morning, talking and laughing – arm in arm, and got a divorce.  After 11 years of being together we just realized that we are great friends, nothing more, nothing less.  We got our marriage dissolved, I was granted back my maiden name, we had Starbucks, we got lunch.  Now I’m working on getting drunk.  I’m not sad, I’m happy.  I’m happy because I like where my life is right now, I like that path that I’ve chosen for myself.  I’m also happy to see my now ex-husband smiling more than ever before, and hearing him laugh again.  The last six months of my life have been filled with so much pain and change, but from that I’ve gained happiness and an amazing sense of who I am.  Divorce isn’t easy, it isn’t fun, and I don’t recommend it… but if you have to go through it, doing it together, as friends – smiling friends who honestly want to see the other happy, makes it just a little bit easier.

Tap It With a Spoon

It has now been seven weeks since I jumped out of a plane and consequently broke my wrist in two spots and tore some ligaments. Cool injury, cooler story… better than stepping off a curb incorrectly and breaking your foot, right?  It’s not going to sway me from jumping next year, even a broken leg wouldn’t.

But my arm is currently in it’s third cast in seven weeks and it’s driving me crazy. Bat shit crazy.  This cast is hot, and heavy, and I whack stuff with it by accident because it’s just, well, there.   And this is the smaller waterproof cast that lets me move my thumb and more of my fingers.  What the crap?

I’ve healed.  I can tell.  There’s minimal pain and I’m moving my fingers like crazy. It’s time for the cast to come off.  It’s so itchy.  So.  Violently.  Itchy. Today I walked around the office with a ruler in my cast all day long, jamming it in there and pulling it out with puffs of dead skin.  How gross is that?  I need to bathe my arm so badly that when I scratch the ruler comes out covered in tiny white flakes. Gnarly!  And when they put the cast on they tell you that absolutely, under no circumstances, can you stick something in your cast to scratch.  Nothing?  I’ve used a broken TV antennae, a letter opener, a butter knife (sharper than you would think), a ruler, pen… even lost a paperclip down the thumb a few weeks back.  That one took hours to get out and two more paperclips.  ”Nothing” they say, just tap the cast with a spoon where it itches.  Seriously.  Hate to break it to you, but neither tea nor soup will make an itch like this subside.

One.  More.  Week.

Hopefully.

October 10th, 2009

I just registered for the Hartford Marathon!

I ran 13.1 miles on May 31st without stopping, so what’s another 13.1 on top of that?

Plus,  on top of getting into killer shape from all the running, when I finish I will be getting my first and only tattoo – 26.2 on my right foot to always remind me that my goals, no matter how far fetched at times, are always attainable if I work hard enough.

Moving On

Today is a big day.  Today is the day that this 30 year old girl moves out of her condo that she shared with her husband and into her very tiny apartment.  Her own apartment, by herself, alone… first time ever.

Thirty.  Getting divorced – after 11 years with her college sweetheart.  A broken wrist (in two places) from skydiving.  No savings.   No furniture.   Two dogs.

Scared shitless.

Excited, thrilled, and proud.

What a Difference a Day Makes

There’s nothing like a day off from the gym, a few hours of SVU and Criminal Intent, and a good night’s sleep to put things back into perspective.

Tonight, just for shits and giggles, I’m going Country Line Dancing with a few friends from work.  It’s several hours away and I’m already embarrassed!  At least I have a cowboy hat so I’ll fit in a little bit.  Margaritas should help too!  I’ll probably need a ride around 1:30 am.  Thanks!

Phhhbbbt

That, by the way, is the only sound that I can make when I open my mouth.  I am utterly exhausted in every sense of the word.  I am physically tired from kickboxing, softball, Zumba, spinning, and my marathon training (24 days to go for the 1/2 marathon).  My legs and my abs are so sore but I need to work through the pain to keep my mind clear.  My running partner has walking pneumonia so the 10+ mile runs by myself are going to be excruciatingly boring.  I have been going to sleep at 1:00 am and getting up at 5:45 am.  I haven’t been drinking enough water, but the wine sure has been flowing.  I actually ate pizza yesterday, awesome.  Work is piling up around me and I can’t seem to make a dent in it.  And this doesn’t take into account one teeny-tiny bit of my messed up personal life. 

I am so thankful that I have my two little hairy snuggle-bunnies to keep me company in bed at night.  If I didn’t have Red, or my mother, or great music to dance around to in my underwear I just don’t think that I could make it through some days.

Just when I think things are going great and that I know what I want… I mean, really know what I want and know who I am… I realize that it’s not that easy.  There’s too much baggage, too many unknowns.  Things in my life don’t come easy. 

I am keeping myself busy and striving to attain a happy and well balanced life.  But sometimes I wonder if being truly happy is a possible reality or just another pipe dream.

Purple Haze

Me loves you once,

Me loves you twice,

Me loves you more than red beans and rice.

What an amazing journey this last week has been.  I am overwhelmed by how much I love the sights, sounds, and even the smells of New Orleans.  I have spent the last seven years of my life moving all over the country, and NOLA is the only place that ever really felt like home.

The trip began like any other, sitting in the Hartford airport bar waiting for my plane to depart.  It ended with tears, hugs, sleep deprivation, a solid sunburn, and maybe a 3 lb weight gain… but who’s counting?

Miss M. and I

The music was simply amazing.  We saw an African drum and dance troupe, we saw Kermit Ruffins play with the Rebirth Brass Band, John Butler, James Taylor, Joe Cocker… and the kicker?  Earth, Wind, and Fire!  We were planning on seeing Dave Matthews or Etta James, but our spot at the Congo Stage was just too good to leave.  Let me tell you, those guys in their matching white suits with silver decals knocked my flip-flops off!  I haven’t danced so much in… well, since the show before, but it was incredible.

Tabby, myself, and Livia

I made new friends, I saw friends that I haven’t seen in what felt like ages.  I drank more vodka, lemonade, and beer than I should have.  I gorged on crawfish at Miss M.’s house after the show on Saturday.  I rubbed Red’s back while she made “more room” in the porta-potty and even got a round of applause when I stuck my nose out for some fresh air.  I ate crawfish bread and white chocolate bread pudding and it tasted just as good as I remembered it (I got the joy of keeping the calories, Red didn’t).  I even ventured over to the West Bank after the crawfish boil to see one of the best Eric Lindell shows I have ever been to.

Red and I at the Eric Lindell show

Red and I have been emailing back and forth non-stop since we’ve gotten home.  When are we going back?  Are we buying VIP tickets to VooDoo Fest in October?  Do I want to go to NOLA for my birthday instead of jumping out of a plane (absolutely not)?  There is just something about that city… it took a hold of me and I don’t ever want to let go.

Red, Doug, and myself

With a Heavy Heart

Today is a rotten day.  Sometimes the prospect of changing your life (not a little, but in it’s entirety) is daunting, sometimes it’s exciting, sometimes it’s what you have to do because the choice, the control  in the situation has been removed from your hands so long ago that there is no other option.  But today it just hurts.  I feel like my life is falling all around me and I’m just trying to avoid the big pieces from whacking me in the head.  I know that when this stage of my life is over that I will be a stronger woman because of it… however my pragmatic view of the future does nothing to help me deal with the massive shit storm of today.  I need a bigger umbrella.

Bayou Bliss

Tomorrow I leave for a long awaited vacation with Red in the best city in the country:  New Orleans.  I spent roughly two of the best years of my life in the Crescent City and made amazing friendships there that will last a lifetime.  Before I moved there, and since I have left, it has been tradition to go to Jazz Fest every year.  This year will be Red’s first and she is in for the time of her life.  Jazz Fest is filled will beer, great food, cowboy hats, sunburns, friends, port-o-potty’s, and non-stop live music. 

I fly in tomorrow night and get picked up by one of my favorite people in the world, Miss M., who is a brilliant graduate student and a very talented marathon runner.  Miss M. got me into running and I ran my very first 5K with her just over two years ago.  Since then she has been one of my biggest cheerleaders in my quest to develop my short-distance running into marathon training.  We plan on drinking heavily tomorrow night and then nursing our hangovers by my hotel pool on Thursday while bronzing our bodies and sipping daiquiri’s.  Heavenly.

Red comes in on Friday morning and it will be a non-stop party from the moment she gets off the plane until we leave on Monday morning.  Eating, drinking, dancing, sunning, drinking, dancing… did I say drinking and dancing?  I really do know what it means to miss New Orleans.

I went shopping this weekend and bought a new bikini (polka-dot), shorts, tanks, and flip-flops… so all I have to do is grab my cowboy hat and a beer coozy and I should be ready to go. 

I’ll post a picture (or eleven) of the festivities when I get back.

Hold the Chicken and Make it Pea

I am not one who typically eats soup, unless it’s my mother’s Borscht or Beef Barley (actually, all of her soups rock).  But recently I have been delving into the soup world more and more because they are filling, low calorie, and have one to two servings of vegetables in each portion.  WW has paired up with Progresso and made a line of 0 and 1 pt. soups that are pretty damn good (just watch the serving size). 

I never make my own soups but I decided to go hog-wild and not only whip something up, but try something that always reminded me of baby vomit.  Pea soup.  My father and my sister swear by it.  I think it’s the ham bone that creeps me out so I found a pig-free recipe on the WW website and it came out wonderful, plus the preparation was extremely easy. 

It makes about 4 servings at 4 pts each.

1 small onion, diced

1 small carrot, diced

1 tsp butter

1 cup of dry split peas (I recommend yellow so it doesn’t look like your typical split pea soup)

2 tsp rosemary, chopped

4c. of fat-free chicken broth

1 garlic clove, halved

In a nonstick saucepan, stir together shallots, carrots,  and butter. Cook over medium-low heat, stirring often, until vegetables begin to color.

Stir in split peas, rosemary and chicken broth. Bring to a simmer and cook until peas are tender, 45 minutes to 1 hour. Season to taste.